I had a panic attack at work today. I had to leave early for fear of heart failure, insanity and the ability to breathe. For those that have no idea what this is like, this is a very horrible physiological experience that feels like you have lost your marbles. Most women feel like they are going insane, most men like they are having a heart attack. Most individuals never go crazy from a panic attack (not documented) and there's only 99.9% of the population that could have a heart attack, go figure I am that .1%! I was born with a heart murmur and then had the luck of getting the ol' rheumatic fever which deteriorates your heart valves, which basically makes me susceptible to a heart attack. It's not a good idea to sneak up and surprise me (unless you are trying to 'off' me).
I wasn't particularly sure how to broach this incident with my employer, "Excuse me, if I don't leave the building this minute I may drop dead?" It seemed a little severe for even Miss B. I just basically insisted that I leave now or else.... It was more the beads of sweat on my forehead, the shaking in my voice that convinced them then my pale complexion and eyes rolling in the back of my skull (pretty!).
There's a surge of adrenaline that runs through your system that after it passes makes one feel like they could be the next Rip Van Winkle and sleep for decades. I came home and crawled into bed fully clothed. My darling Fancy was gracious enough to help me off with my shoes. When I awoke hours later, I was grateful to be alive and able to breathe normally. I went straight to the computer to put my angst into my faux creative outlets. I worked on Toi's Platypus (horrible that the Latin name for Platypus is so close to the human word for butt hole...)
and then I had an idea, what if a Hipster wanted my Specimen Plate? Who am I to deny them this luxury?
Being a compulsive doodler this is definitely something I would have done during one of my high school classes. 'Different', 'bout sums up me and the rest of the animal kingdom, no?
