Blah,Blah,Blahg

TWEET...

Our new advertisers!  No, just kiddin'.... I thought this was the cutest print ad--ever!  I love it, clean lot's of white space, photography is excellent, ring is phenomenal,charming and cheeky without taking away from the prestige of the brand.  Whomever was the mastermind behind this, I bow down to you and your parakeet/lovebird type creatures.   just all around goodness.

WELL, NATURALLY...

I am not a cynical person.  I may be wallowing in my unfortunate circumstances at the moment but the optimist in me keeps rearing it's lovely head and saying 'look at the bright side'.  I am in no mood for bright side's but I acquiesce because I am weak right now from the trauma of being a lemming. Okay, so the bright side about my job? It is in the design industry, in interior design to be precise, something I really, really wanted to get into.  It's not a walk in the park, it's kind of gross. Sorry--the positive--I get free subscriptions to design magazines,three I can't stand, one I already have a subscription to and one that is completely awesome--World of Interiors.  It looks similar to Architectural Digest in layout BUT the interiors feel very Country Living, but in a cool way not cutesy, (I like cute, cutesy sends me over the edge).

If you are not familiar (I wasn't) it's a Conde Nast publication (you know the kind folks that bring you Domino, Vogue, Vanity Fair, Lucky, Bride's, Gourmet, GQ, Cookie, etc, etc, etc...) It's an English publication (another reason why I love).  I thought I would show you this little visual feast of a story they did on amateur Victorian naturalist Olivia Tonge.  I think the juxtaposition of subjects and the quirky comments are very now and very up Miss B's alley.  I might have to tear a page from her naturalist book and do something inspired by them...

I hope I didn't disappoint on the visual buffet I served up.  I just think these are the bee's knee's.  The Pomelo--divine!  It's almost Friday!!!! (A girl can dream....)

THE DODO IS EXTINCT...

And other great pearls of wisdom.  It's almost Monday and I am feeling those Sunday blues...I didn't work on my escape plan since I got caught up in a manic frenzy of inspiration (or perhaps just a manic frenzy).  I decided to do my own version of the cabinet of curiousities which I have dubbed the 'Cabinette Curieux'.  I like names that end in 'ette' so I took liberties (as usual).  I didn't get very far, I created a Dodo and Jack-o-lope print for the collection but I have plans for a beluga whale (they're pretty cute as far as whales are concerned) platypus, flying monkey, pink elephant and albino giraffe (thanks toi), to start.  If I didn't have to go to work, I could probably finish by the end of the week.  Oh well...

I think they would look great in a grouping.  I tried to keep the coloring similiar (but not too matchy) so they would look good side by side.  I also did some in alternate color ways like sage, indigo and violet (below) because my philosophy is if you need a pop of color in your home why not do it with a dodo?

Yes, you too can have a Dodo (or jack-o-lope) grace your abode with one click of your little mouse. Remember 100% of the profits go to the 'Free Miss B. Fund' which will provide a means for a poor, Latin American woman to fulfill her dream of being able to be creative all day just for you and you and you...Now put the fun back into fund and buy today...

FOR FRIENDS AND LOVERS...

My search to bring you download goodness has been a huge success (thus far).  I am amazed by the talent, generosity and the general kindness that I have received from my requests, suckers, kind souls.  Just when you think I may have ran out of cool new things for you I pull someone like Lidia Varesco of Lidia Varesco Greetings out of my hat.  I really love these fresh and happy notecards (two color ways!) and hope you do as well.

And now here's a word from our sponsor...

Lidia Varesco Greetings is a line of modern greeting cards and stationery that is inspired, elegant and sometimes whimsical. Though running a bustling graphic design business made me happy, I yearned to combine my day job with my first love, fine art—thus a line of cards was born.

Printed on fine papers (including recycled), our cards express our design aesthetic with a fine art flair. Featuring beautiful typography and original illustrations of botanical motifs, the greetings, notecards and other paper goodies will delight the recipient.

Our cards and stationery are lovingly made in our Chicago studio. We can personalize any of our products with your personal (or business) logo and message. We also love to do custom projects of any size.

Please be sure to visit her lil' shop, I'm sure she would love to hear what you think of her pretty offering, so leave lot's of comments for her.  As always downloads are archived for your downloading pleasure for as long as I can remember to pay my Typepad bill, so Download while you can...

THE INSPIRED MIND...

I often get asked how I thought of this or that (I am on medication) (okay it's for allergies, but I am sure it does something to me).  A prime example  is my 'Time Machine', that was easy because I actually have one--duh!   It's difficult for me to articulate how I come up with ideas they just sort of flit through my mind and some become squatters until I proverbially 'evict' them.  I made a mental note the next time I found a good example of the Miss B brain process to document it here, maybe it would inspire you as well or maybe you could offer me some advice or suggest a good shrink...

So here's how this project started, I saw this lovely image in Domino magazine:

photo yanked from the pages of Domino

I ripped it out and thoughtfully placed it on my inspiration board with a post-it that read 'Great dichotomy' my Fancy saw and asked, "What's so great about that?"  I answered, "It's cool, the dreamy colors, the soft brush strokes and the image of the rhino in profile, like those hunters plaques, above the mantel, I just love it."  "Hon, that's not a rhino," he said (so very confidently)  "Of course it's a rhino, look at it, it's an abstract rhino, but not really because you can clearly tell it's a rhino in profile."  "maybe it's a rhino dove, but that's a bird."  I waited for him to leave the room before I brought the image beneath my nose and examined, he was right, it wasn't a rhino.  Well, it was still cool, but it would be so much cooler if she had a profile of a rhino above her mantle right?  So, that's where the inspiration for these came from:

These rhino's are MINE but I know you want one too, so get yours here

I added a bird, a blue sparrow (creative license) and I am very happy with the results.  In a nutshell (how apropos?) this is how my big brain works (sometimes). 

By the way, if you wanted to commission someone we both know to make you a wild animal portrait for your mantle or above your bed (anywhere your little heart desires), in any color way you choose (I understand wanting to match your artwork to your decor, it's okay...I won't tell anyone...) Please do not hesitate to contact me:

FreeMissB@BlahBlahBlahg.org 

I am sooo not above making money from my insanity...

MEET THE MRS.

I am well aware that in order for one to read this post, one (me) must actually post it. So without further ado I am pleased to introduce you to your new BFF Mrs. T.

I was delighted when Miss B. offered me the role of "Hump Day Guest Blahgger." To have a title somewhat lewd in tone truly suits my personality. "We made it to Hump Day!" or "Happy Hump Day!" is a phrase I am very familiar with having been a drone in Corporate America for the past 9.8 years. The most vicious attacks utilizing this phrase are generally launched while trying to quietly prepare my morning coffee and are often uttered by the middle-management yahoos who feel some sort of need to rally us uninspired low level employees. I must say that to my ears it comes off as odd. "Hump" generally congers up images of my mother's late Cockapoo, Mr. Snickers, and a whole host of other National Geographic related animal imagery. If I get my mind out the gutter for two seconds and put "hump" into its proper context - a rounded or raised mass of earth (according to Oxford's) - is it really all that exciting? A hump is far from a mountain. I'm sure a hump wouldn't intimidate any respectable hill and, in that case, is it really such a grand achievement that we have made it to Hump Day? Furthermore I can't grasp why at 9am I am being congratulated for having endured such strife as it is in fact only 9am and I haven't done a damn thing. Since Monday is generally spent recuperating from Sunday and Tuesday spent watching the latest on YouTube, do I really deserve any accolades? Perhaps it would be more appropriate to acknowledge corporate endeavors Wednesday evening after we have presumably completed at least a small fraction of work or at least pretended to do so (which can be equally as difficult, trust me). "Happy Hump Night Everyone!" -  but that brings us right back to the gutter and a potential harassment suit to boot. So having said all that, like Amy Poehler's character in Mean Girls - I'm gonna try and serve up some Hump Day Treats as it is now my sworn duty to bolster the fact that we are indeed halfway through the week and we are all gonna make it out of this cube-jungle alive.

I will be filling the coming Wednesdays with rants, er intelligent conversation, about such important topics as cupcakes, how a convertible can make you instantly popular in Los Angeles and what I should be for Halloween. I'm happy to entertain any questions on any subject as you can clearly see I am a crazy as any therapist and therefore just as qualified.

Until next time folks,

Mrs. T.
 
And if by now you have the Humpty Dance song stuck in your head, you wouldn't be alone...

I AM THE FANATIC...

photo stolen from penaddiction and put through my time machine(circa '82)

    Oh, Sharpie pen how I love thee, let me count the ways.  One-You are perfect (or near perfect)--the end.  This is Sharpie's first foray into 'pens' but Sharpie always did pens you say.  No my friend they did permenant markers and they did have some suave ones at that,the ultra thin--nice.  The retractable, good idea, make it thinner and we can talk.  This though is perfect.  It doesn't bleed (although I have to admit to missing the Sharpie smell).  It makes my penmanship look far better than it actually is, but a good pen will do that for you. Not bringing this to work with me is on par with me not having a phone or computer, I just wouldn't be as efficient (or look as efficient as I know my Sharpie pen makes me look).  So this is what I am fanatical about and if you like some good pen action (we're talking faux architect all the way) this is your new best friend...

Before I leave  you this Wednesday Eve (Okay, Tuesday).  I wanted to get you ready for your new BFF Mrs. T.  She's going to help a pal out and write up some funnies for your hump day enjoyment.  What makes me think my pretties will like her?  Well, please find below an actual excerpt from her last email to me with her Wednesday musings....

Okay, here 'tis:

If you hate it, I won't be offended and you are more than free to scrap the whole idea and write that I was kidnapped, abducted, or am on the run from the cops.

I really think you will like her and I have the feeling that you won't miss me at all.

MAKE MONDAY'S FUN DAYS!

    It's Monday, day 122 of my captivity, but who's counting?  It's not so bad this week as my Master is out of town and I can at least check my emails to see if the job offers are pouring in (they are not).  I guess there's not a huge market for employee's that publicly talk smack about their employer's.  As my blahg grows my chances of getting hired are about slim to none.  I am 'that' girl that complains about doing time.  Whatever.  People don't know what they are missing I am a helluva employee when my alleged employer isn't allegedly mentally torturing me and my alleged co-workers and allegedly not giving us breaks, but oh yes, we are allegedly allowed to eat at our desks. Alas, it's Monday and like almost every other office worker in America I am dreading the next ten or so hours.  To help you make it through I am offering this little ditty from our very own Mrs. T, who will be taking over the blahg on hump day, enjoy...

Talking frog by THE BELLA BELLA CO.

Yes it's okay to use as your screen saver. No, it's not okay to sell without my knowledge or my benefiting.  No it's not okay to claim the damn talking frog as your own.  So there.

Two women are walking down the street when suddenly a frog jumps out in front of them and says "Please dear ladies, I am not really a frog, but a handsome prince and if one of you kisses me I will turn back into my true handsome self and be yours, to love you forever and ever." One of the women reaches down and picks up the frog and puts it in her pocket. Shocked, the other woman says "Well, aren't you going to kiss the frog and turn him into a handsome prince to be yours and to love you forever and forever?" And the other woman looks at her friend and says "No, I'd rather have a talking frog."

Happy Monday.

BTW, 'F' Typepad for f'*&%!@$ up my freakin' fonts!

CUTENESS RULES!

The bird is by Kittyanydots

It's Friday, in case you haven't been counting down the days like a prisoner in jail (like myself).  It's that time again pretties where I have convinced another unsuspecting creative to participate in my download madness.  We have quite an arsenal now which I think you should bookmark when you need a quick gift for someone and need to save your dinero for shoes, hand bags or other necessities AND you can say you made it yourself (well you did download and print on paper, it counts). 

I am quite a fan of the freebie and this one from Cynthia of Kittyanydots (say that three times fast) is sure to be one you will come to time and time again.  It includes some good things-- a bird, pattern and ornate frame, how can we go wrong?  Please make sure you visit her site so her sales spike and I won't look like I am just doling out freebies to my favorite friends...

This in from Cynthia:

This download prints on a regular 8.5x11 sheet of paper or cardstock. Use these for notes, listmaking,
journaling and more! kittyanydots offers sundry crafty goodness aand Visit her shops for more printables,
notecards, art/photo prints, original art, and graphic design. Join her mission to help cuteness to conquer the world!

Download here

P.S. Totally sorry about the wonky fonts, ever since Typepad made "improvements", those said "improvements" have messed with my ability to give you a font in the same size and color, so if you can read this from outerspace or are begging your cube mate for a microscope, please except my apologies until further notice...